What Would You Do?

You're a married man with 3 children and a nice house.

You're online and get chatting to a female.

It's not long before you start chatting together on the phone.

Inexplicably, you fall head over heels in love.

What would you do?

You’re in a shop and notice an offer; spend £5 or more and get a free bunch of flowers.

Your bill comes to £5-37 and get handed the flowers.

You take them home for you partner who says “They’re nice, what did you get them for?”

What would you do?

You're watching the news on TV with your partner.

During a news item you notice yourself in the background snogging someone you're having an affair with.

What would you do?

You're home alone upstairs in your bedroom.

You're feeling randy and start to undress in front of the mirror.

You get carried away and start playing.

Then you see the window cleaner at the window.

What would you do?

You're tidying up in the kitchen.

You notice a bluebottle fly inside the microwave oven and you close the door quickly, trapping it.

What would you do?

Your wife has had her friends over and it's getting late.

You're in the kitchen washing up.

You think they'll never go.

Then you hear the front door go and people leave.

You think 'At last' and sense your wife come into the kitchen.

You say, 'Thank God for that. I thought they'd never go'.

You turn around and see her stood there with two of her mates who want one last cup of coffee.

What would you do?

You and your partner are visiting friends for a meal.

Dinner is served and you eagerly tuck in.

You notice a long hair in your food starting to wrap around your fork.

What would you do?

You're standing at the sink doing the washing up.

The tap is running.

Your partner calls you upstairs.

Up you go to find your partner wants to make love.

So you oblige. You get to the point of no return.

And then you realise that tap is still running.

What would you do?

You've just been promoted to a managerial position.

Your professional colleague has been off sick for 3 weeks.

You ring his home to find out when he'll be back and his wife answers.

She tells you he's asleep and will ring you back.

Just as you put down the phone you hear a child's voice say 'Mummy, why did you lie?'.

What would you do?

You're at work and dying for the loo.

You rush to the toilet and lock yourself in a cubicle.

When the coast is clear, you let the world fall out of your bottom.

Which is when you realise there is no toilet paper.

What would you do?